Emily's First Day of School

As much as it was heartbreaking for me, Emily was so excited that we finally got the call that there was a spot for her in the preschool program. She is my baby who is now going to school! My last one at home is now gone :( She is super happy and doing excellent, so as sad as it makes me.....she is ecstatic.

Embarrassing Mom

I was dropping Benjamin off at school the other day and he decided to sit down and eat breakfast, even though I had already slaved over an amazing bowl of cereal for him to eat at home before we left. So Emily and I went to drop his backpack off in his locker, and as I came back to the cafeteria to say goodbye to him I saw that he was sitting by this very pretty girl that he must have known because he was trying desperately not to talk to her only the way that boys do with very pretty girls. So we walked up to him and I said, "Bye Ben. Mommy will see you at home later have a great day." And as I leaned down to give him a kiss he shyly smiled and turned his head looking inconspiculously at the girl sitting next to him. I smiled and said, "Love you buddy. See you at home." I walked away feeling neglected and sad that my 5 year old son did not want to kiss his "mommy" goodbye.

So today I dropped him off at school again only today he wanted to go straight outside to play before the bell rang. As I said goodbye to him I asked him for a kiss. He looked at me again shyly looking around to see if anyone was looking and quickly kissed me so that no one would see.

I guess that I should be happy that it wasn't because of the girl, it was just because I am his mom. On second thought, I'm not sure if that makes me happy at all???

Hard Work

Why does hard work and wanting to aspire to be the best conveniently follow with someone's either jealousy, disgust, or ill will?

Trying Times

It seems like things are falling apart for us lately. Classes suck, the car broke--then fixed--then broke again, washing machine crashed, computer crashed, Tony received a speeding ticket, and Tuck hurt his leg. I wonder if we should pay for the air we breathe too??

Thank you God for these trying times, but do you think we can be done now? Amen

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34.

After all today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday

Setting the Stage

Noah and Ben were pretending they were saving the world one day in the back of the van.

Ben says, "we'll save everybody in the world!"
Noah says, "Yeah! Except China, we don't need to save them."

I wonder what he heard to make him think of that? I find it humorous.

Remembering...

This day 10 years ago was the last day that I would talk to you, tomorrow morning will be the day that your blood spilled. The blood that I saw, the blood that I cannot get out of my head. I remember reading the gruesome details of the report, the details that I cannot forget. I want to forget, I want to not remember, I want you to be here, I want you to know my kids, I want you to know the person that I am, I want you to know that I am not the person you once knew. As the tears run down my face I am forced to remember all the details that I wish I could forget. I am forced to remember the relationship that we had, the relationship that was so hard to deal with on a daily basis. It was so hard to be your sister, you made it so hard and I hate you for that. But I love you and I hate that I miss you so much after all that we have been through, yet here I am missing you. I am sorry for all that you think was wrong with your life and I can honestly say that I never judged you for anything....I know the kinds of things that you went through; I hope that your faith in the Almighty was strong enough to rescue you from your pain. I hate that I feel that I cannot deal with this completely, I don't know how!! I love you, I miss you, and I don't know how to feel about that. I survived our relationship, but how do I survive your loss?

Remembering is painful and I just want it to stop, how do I make it stop.....

Craziness

So I have to take 14 credit hours next quarter. I'm kinda freaking out about that because not only will I have school, but work, kids, home, Tony, and then with Spring come sports. I think that I just may go mad. What's life without a bit of chaos? Thank you to my support group, I'm going to need all that I can get!!

Thought of the Day

If you forget everything that you are supposed to be doing, does that make you a bad mom? I cannot seem to keep anything straight these days. It's almost as though I am pregnant again, only not.

"MY HUT'S ON FIRE"

I got this story from a friend and thought that it was very good. I hope that you all enjoy...

The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for GOD to rescue him, but every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming. Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect himself from the elements, and to store his few possessions. One day, after scavenging for food he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, with smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened, and everything was lost. He was stunned with disbelief, grief, and anger. "GOD, how could you do this to me?" he cried.

Early the next day he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him.
"How did you know I was here?"Asked the weary man of his rescuers.
"We saw your smoke signal," they replied.

It's easy to get discouraged when things are going bad, but we shouldn't lose heart, because GOD is at work in our lives, even in the midst of pain, and suffering. Remember that . . . . . . . . .The next time your little hut seems to be burning to the ground. It just may be a smoke signal that summons the grace of GOD.

Endurance

"I know there will be days there will be pain to bring you glory."

I have been thinking of the path that brought Tony and I together. We were supposed to meet plenty of times before we actually did because of a mutual friend, but God had other plans. I had to go through many trials before that could happen, before I was ready to hear what I needed to hear from God through Tony. He also needed to experience some things before he could show me His mercy. I was on a downward spiral when Tony came into my life. God knew when I would need intervention and knew the perfect time to bring Tony into my life to glorify Him. Tony persevered through all my baggage and never gave up on me when plenty of other "people" would have. God knew that about him. The wonderful thing about our marriage is that we are always there for each other and support each other through everything. I know that these things should be obvious in a marriage, but for many they are not. So my point in all this is to say-

"Thank you God for my wonderful husband and the pain we had to endure to be ready for each other and You. I pray that you continue to bless our relationship and our beautiful family. Thank you for the many people that help us through our struggles, including our new family at Faith Harbor. Thank you for this church and I pray that you bless this ministry and the many people that work so hard to make it a success. If it were not for You it would be impossible to have this place of worship. Thank you so much for all the blessings you pour down on us and I pray that we gorify You with each and every one of them. We love you~Amen"

Another Year

This past year has been trying with the economic situation in our city and country. Fortunately, the start to this year supplies a very bright future. Tony got a great new job and we are very excited to see where it leads us in the future. We are starting at a fantastic new church and can't wait to see what God has in store for this place and the people in it. We can't wait to grow deeper in the Lord together as a family and also with new friends. We have made some "delightful" new friends that we can't wait to get to know even better. Here's to hoping that this year will be even better than last year!!

'Lord- for this new year I pray that we keep you in our sites and not take our eyes off of you. I pray that you continue to bless our family and friends and help us to have another wonderful year with you at our center. Thank you for all that you have provided to us!!~Amen'